Well how the hell does a virgin to blogging write their first ever blog about their first ever business! My oh my what pressure. I have oh so much to say to you all about my business venture and could write about it for a very long time but from my reading of other blogs and also ‘how to write blogs’ blogs, I recognise that although blogs are a platform for a person to elaborate on issues and bits and bobs, there is no point in writing loads because ‘nowadays’ not many of us have the attention span long enough to read more than a page at once! This is going to be a great learning journey for myself as far as writing concisely goes…so I’d better get on with it! Oh no! I’ve already used up half a page rambling! Maybe it’s concise rambling?! Ok now it isn’t because I am still doing it!!!!
I will spend this blog telling you about my journey.
That’s the Spot is a long time coming. For a few years I’ve wanted to open up a business with a view to taking away the taboos still associated with talking about sex toys, especially for women. There is something exciting about having a chat about ‘naughty things’ and it is great to be able to provide the right environment to do this in and for women to recognise that as soon as you do open up, you learn so much about sex and masturbation!
I am aware that there may be men reading this and thinking ‘what about me?’ I myself am a woman so straight away I know more about my biology, and also because I am gay, I don’t actually know much about men!! Female pleasure is where my expertise lies (take that how you will) so I may as well play to my strengths. I am happy to chat with men when they are part of a heterosexual couple but if you are a gay man, I can point you in the direction of places where you will get the info you need.
I worked for the amazing Sh! Women’s Erotic Emporium in London for 6 months back in 2008 and absolutely loved it there. The only reason I didn’t work there longer is because I was trying to save for travels whilst living in London so I had to sacrifice my soul a bit to work for more money elsewhere. I wanted to open up a Cardiff version of Sh! back in 2009 when I was intending on settling down but I was in an unhealthy relationship and when that finally ended I planned to travel instead. Before travels happened, I ended up meeting the wonderful woman that is now my wife. My life has been a book of far too many chapters of different jobs, different loves and different cities and whilst it was fun, the last two big chapters that have happened over the last 2 years have been buying a house and then getting married. It was a big change in gear for me and seemed like a good start to end that book and start the sequel!
The first book was carefree, focussed on the present rather than the future, where there was never money to spare (it also includes a failed pursuit of stand up comedy fame!). The sequel for me is about growing up and actually caring about how my future pans out as in a way, I have more reason to live longer now and want to make sure I can have enough fun. I have a very intelligent, ambitious and career-focussed wife and this has rubbed off on me so as soon as we got married last October I knew that then was the time to follow my dream of becoming self employed and taking control of my career rather than going from job to job without any growth prospects enough to keep me interested. I was to merge my passion for sex toys, interacting with my favourite gender, performing and doing something alternative and open a sex toy shop!
I was lucky in January to get a part time job that paid me enough to support myself whilst looking into my business idea. I contacted Sh! to see if they were in a position to franchise, which they weren’t able to, so I set off to open up a sex toy shop aimed at women with a café bar on the ground level all on my own. Lovely idea eh?! Imagine being on Cardiff High St and walking into a café bar that makes excellent coffee and offers a variety of teas and cake, sitting down for a cuppa then heading upstairs to a space created to provide a safe space for shopping for sex toys with all the toys there ready for you to have a play with. Cardiff Council were happy to give me info with how to apply for a Sex Establishment license and advised on an alcohol license (if I were to open up on St Mary’s St it would be very difficult to get an alcohol license because it is considered a ‘saturation zone’). I could see the hoops I would have to jump through to make this idea work – the biggest problem being that if I open up a sex establishment, I have to put 21 days notice on the premises of my intentions. But then I couldn’t buy premises without knowing I could definitely get the license for what I needed. Chicken and egg! Then after a bit more probing (no pun intended!) it turns out that the council wouldn’t let me open up a café bar and a sex establishment in the same building under the same name. How weird! This put a stop to my plans – I wasn’t confident that having such a specialist shop on the High St would make enough money to keep it going without the café alongside it to support it.
This happened at the end of May and over the next couple of days I make some quick decisions on what to do next. For a whole afternoon I wondered whether it would be a good time to try for a baby but then I remembered I didn’t want one! I soon realised that I should open up a consultation business that wouldn’t require premises and would allow me to still do the same as the original idea – talk about sex toys over a cuppa or a cocktail. As soon as that decision was made, things moved along quickly. I, along with feedback from friends, thought of a shop name, I got the logo sorted, chose a website designer and started buying in stock. My main focus right now is starting to practice my soirees on various groups of friends to refine my soiree technique and organise the launch for my business for October the 1st.
In my next blog I am going to broach the subject of masturbation but for now, if I can ask you all to spread the word about my business, that would be great. If you are local to South East Wales I am happy to visit you and a group of friends anytime from now. If you book me in before October the 1st I am offering 15% off all the toys, as long as all the participants give me constructive feedback! The hostess will get a toy of her choice up to the value of £25 or 25% off a more expensive toy. This offer is only until September the 30th. I aim to write one blog a week and post it on a Friday afternoon. I welcome comments! If you have any requests for blog posts let me know