Category Archives: Sex Issues

Enhance your Sex Life with These 5 Foods

I would like to welcome Jeff Caceres as a guest blogger to my blog. Jeff Caceres is a freelance blogger who is passionate to share what he knows about improving relationships of families and friends. You can check out his website at Her Online Network to learn more about the tips and advice that he had about sex, parenting, women and family.

Here is his first post, where he shares the best foods to enhance our sex lives! Enjoy!

One of the luxuries of life that humankind has is Sex. It is one of the essential intimate rituals enjoyed by couples , individuals, multiple lovers and people indulging in th is pleasurable activity, especially when they share the same passion. In the course of our lives, the ebbing of our sexual urges will happen at some point in our lifetime. In some cases, the pleasure disappears prematurely. In effect, a hot sizzling relationship fizzles out severing relationships. Don’t despair, besides those over the counter remedies are natural edible foods that will perk up the fantasies stuck within our souls and erupt in glorious fashion.
Here is the list of the five amazing and foods for enhancing your sex life:
1. Avocados – The ancient Aztecs refer to this libido enhancer as testicles. The shape looks like it. This fruit is known to be a sexual enhancer due to its rich content of unsaturated fat and oppositely low on saturated fat. It keeps your circulatory works active and pumping. Blood flow is flowing in all the required chambers. Eating this fruit alone gives less risk to heart ailments.

2. Almonds – They are also on top of the sexual stimulants. This snack also aids the fertility aspect for both men and women . Almonds are rich in Selenium, Zinc, and Vitamin E is essential to your sexual health and reproductive system. It’s like asparagus, another sexy food that drives you crazy . Cashews are also actively rich with zinc to keep the blood and juices flowing.

Aside from almonds, these kinds of nuts are sexual stimulators:

• Walnuts
• Peanuts
• Pecans
• Hazelnuts
• Sunflower seeds
• Pumpkin seeds

3. Strawberries – These kinds of foods are ones that could boil your blood when at a frenzy with your mate in all kinds of relationships . Studies show that these fruits keep the baby healthy and ward off the threat of congenital disabilities during pregnancy. It also increases the sperm count of males. The chocolate dipped strawberry is a libido booster. Now you know why chocolates are such popular gifts for Valentine’s Day. Chocolates are sexual stimulators because of the presence of methylxanthines, an upper for sexual stimulation.

4. Seafood – They are potent sexual stimulators. Aphrodisiac properties of oysters had been around for centuries. Some people lambast this belief as a myth. Research proves that there is a reality to this. Studies show that the consumption of oysters, clams, scallops and other shellfish raise the levels of oestrogen and androgens. Oysters are rich in Zinc that streams up the blood flow to the genitals of men and women. The blood flow to the right places means a heavenly eruption is about to converge.

5. Garlic – Mothers use to warn their sons and daughters not to eat garlic before a date. The odor of garlic in one’s mouth is unbearable. But this spice rattles the circulatory system and pumps your blood to all the appropriate places, and that includes before a date. Garlic is the herb of prevention for hypertension, heart diseases, and high cholesterol. Coagulation is thwarted in the blood vessels thereby speeding up blood circulation. With the help of garlic, it is perfect for you and your partner in bed. The strong smell is negligible when both of you ate it earlier.
There are more blood heating and circulatory enhancements that alleviate sexual libido. The top 5 are just some of the great ones. Aren’t you glad that these foods are around in aid of sexual pleasures and intimacy? Get one and enjoy your evening.

Polycystic Ovaries and how to deal with them

I attended a conference yesterday (Saturday the 15th) and it was a conference for women with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. I was diagnosed with having this condition when I was 15. I got it checked again when I was 23 (the diagnosis when I was 15 was based on that fact that the ultrasound scan couldn’t find my ovaries, which was a sign that my ovaries were small and poorly!)

Having had a sharp increase in anxiety and weight gain over the last year, I thought it was time to think a bit more about the impact that PCOS was having on me, and what I could do to ‘make it better’

The conference was jam-packed full of speakers who had the perfect specialities for women like us. I learned one big myth, which was that there are no cysts involved! As a result of this, they are working on a name change. It also hit home when they spoke about our risks of getting type 2 diabetes and that being overweight accelerated this process. Oh, the other thing that helped me was that I need to make peace with the fact that I can’t expect loads of weight loss, but should still strive to be as fit and healthy as I can, even if it means having to shop in Evans for the rest of my life! (I kid. I’m not my mum and I am quite butch nowadays!)

I am going to stop myself from sharing with you all of the information I learned, because this post will go on forever! What I am going to say is that the speakers were of such a high calibre, and my goodness, we got a lot for the price we paid for the conference – £45 for 7 different talks, and we were fed really well too! My wife came with me and we were welcomed so warmly, and I must say, I felt like I was with ‘my people’ (if it was a conference for queer women with PCOS it would have been the ultimate ‘my people’!) By chatting with different women there, I was quick to see the various frustrations that come with having PCOS – whether it is hair loss, hirutism, difficulty in losing weight, anxiety and depression, acne, irregular periods and the added worry of the fact that us women are insulin resistant, which can increase the likelihood of us getting type 2 diabetes (3-fold) and cardiovascular diseases. With these discussions came a bit of relief in knowing that there is a reason my body is like this and also that I wasn’t alone. The bigger picture was that this was affecting everybody’s self-esteem.

The charity that holds this conference annually is called Verity. This is the only charity that focuses on PCOS, and I am grateful for this. I got to see the AGM in action, which was actually really informative and helpful! When it came to money, they shared with us the annual income of various charities and showed us what their income was in comparison. My goodness, I tell you, these women do so much for the world of PCOS in their spare time with so little money – all on a voluntary basis!

The reason I am writing this blog is to raise awareness of Verity and the work they do for PCOS that nobody else does. I am signing up to be a member in the next few days, which is only £15 for the year, and this includes getting money off your ticket to the conference (this year it was £10) and access to various information booklets, as well as a digital magazine. They also have a members area, which I think would be great for me, now that I am exploring this aspect of my life a bit more.

So. For those who have PCOS (oh, I also learned that some of us just have PCO without it being a syndrome) or those who know women with PCOS, please consider a donation or joining. They really don’t ask for much money, considering the benefits, and the hard work that they do for their members. If you could see how much money the big well-known charities make, you may see that it would be worth sending a fiver over to Verity instead every now and again!

There was a general consensus that PCOS isn’t taken too seriously by the medical professions, yet it affects 1 in 5 women in the UK. I remember the second time I was diagnosed – the Dr was so vague and nonchalant about it. I didn’t feel like I was being taken seriously.

Even if you donated a pound, it would help (that whole thing of ‘if everybody did a little’!) Please share this blog to raise awareness. I know that there are so many different charities out there and it is difficult to give money to them all. I get that. This is my agenda and if you think that it is anybody else’s agenda, let them know about it!

With love,

Rhiannon xx

Guest Blog – Disability and Sex

I met TrojanViper through the power of Twitter (@TrojanViper), we were actually introduced by my favourite sex toy reviewer @josephine_kk who wrote a guest blog a few weeks ago. TrojanViper was lovely enough to accept my invitation of being a guest blogger. He is a paraplegic and I wanted to know his thoughts on sex and being disabled. This is what he wrote:

(Oh, and this is my first male blogger too!)

You know, I remember taking Sex Ed in Junior High. And as I look back now at my life and where I’ve gone, as well as my thought process, I think that I would stop and say “Wait, how does this help me?” I have long thought that there’s been a real disconnect between the “non-disabled” or “able-bodied” and the disabled, on many fronts. And that’s because of a lack of understanding, and the incorrect perception that we, the disabled, can’t do many things, such as, have sex.

One of the misconceptions is that we can’t. People think that we can’t, and usually that’s it. Case closed, end of story. So we are left to live our lives.

Here’s the thing, and I do this too. Don’t make assumptions. Don’t assume that people who are different than you, can’t do something, like have sex. Or that we don’t think about sex. Because believe me we do. Or is that just me?….Uhoh (lol) This stems partially from a lack of understanding, ignorance. And most people, the “able-bodied” are okay with their ignorance.

Well on behalf of all of us. Wake up! We’d like to have sex too. We’d like to be in a relationship with a man or woman who cares for us, and loves us for who we are on the outside, as well as on the inside. Now I’m not going to sit here and tell you that every person with a disability isn’t in a relationship, there are many that are, and I am genuinely happy for them, and yet secretly jealous at the same time. How do they do it, I’d like to know.

Let’s get back to sex for a moment. Being disabled can encompass many things. Some may not be able to walk(like me) some might have a speech impediment and not be able to speak well. Some, again like me, aren’t able to feel their genitalia. And to some that hurts. It’s extremely frustrating not being able to feel your penis. Even worse, not being able to cum or ejaculate. Or to ejaculate and not know unless you put your hand down there and feel that you have, essentially made a little mess. That’s reassuring that your doctors were wrong in telling you that ejaculation wasn’t possible. There’s a certain validation in that.

We are people too. We are part of society. Don’t shut us out based on something that you think you might know. But are probably dead wrong.



Mental Health and Sex

Introducing That’s The Spot’s first Guest Blog!

I met Beth over the waves of the internet about a month ago. She is both a sex toy reviewer and a Yankee Candle lover! She writes some great blogs and fab toy reviews. I have taken great joy in reading what she had to say! She was listed as one of the top 100 ‘sex blogging super-heroes’ with in both 2013 and 2014, nice one! I was lucky enough last week for her to accept my request of writing a blog post for That’s The Spot, and here it is! This post looks at mental health and its link with sex. If you like what she has to say, head on over to her website – to read more of her posts.

Mental health is a rather taboo subject that people find awkward to approach.

It doesn’t help matters, when someone who has lived with depression experiences ignorance from the general public and at times, it can often make matters worse.

One of the big effects that people generally experience with a mental illness, is that of a low sex drive, erectile dysfunction or no ‘want’ to participate in sexual activities.  It can feel like a needless chore, to some and to others, depression and alike, can have the opposite effect.

Some people living with depression, anxiety or other similar illnesses, can sometimes find themselves craving for sex but why? Is it a need to be touched?  The want of feeling that you are needed? Or because you crave the rush of those endorphins kicking in?

Hyper sexuality can have many points to it, such as:

  • Never feeling sexually satisfied
  • Inappropriate sexual behaviors
  • Putting current relationships at risk due to multiple partners
  • Never feeling gratified with your experience
  • Increased masturbation (never a bad thing!)

The list can go on but why?  When you suffer with a mental disease such as Bi-polar, your emotions are like a roller coaster and a way of hiding that pain, can be through sexual sanctification.  Using sex as a sort-of-painkiller, so to speak. You could class this as a ‘sexual mania’, using sex as a way to avoid other intimate forms of any relationship.

But what about the opposite effect?  A lack of the sex drive!

Many things can effect a low libido, from medication to mood swings.  A noted side effect to taking daily medication can be a dive in the sex drive, erectile dysfunction and many other attributes.  But don’t worry, there are ways of getting out of this, especially if you have a partner but it does involve a big effort on the non-depressive partner.

Erectile Dysfunction can be attributed to medication, emotional issues and much more.  It doesn’t mean that the man living with this, can not enjoy sexual contact.  There are many products in today’s market that have been formed, to help those living with ED.

You could try cock cages, penis extensions and cock rings. If these do not take your fancy and you only wish to satisfy your partner, then you could try a remote control bullet or a couples sex toy like the Rocks Off Rock Chick.

There are herbal alternatives that a man with ED could try but I would seek advice from your GP, before trying these alternatives.

With women, it can be slightly more complicated but try having fun with this!  If your lady is feeling low and not in the mood, set up a romantic-stress-free night in.  Low lighting, candles, a glass of wine and soft music.  You need to make her feel more than just a bit of meat, this sounds harsh but it is true.

Try a massage candle and indulge her body in a mixture of gentle touches, teasing strokes and relaxation.  Find what spots do it for her and focus on them.  Make her feel like she’s the only thing in the world right at that moment, that you care for.

Why this avenue?  You need to lead the body into a direction that kick starts that sexual motor, make her brain refocus on the heights that you can reach.  It can take a while but approaching your partner this way, does have its benefits. Whilst relaxing her or him, you are reintroducing the body to a non-stressful environment.

These are little tips that can help but most of all, if you or a partner are suffering with depression, please seek a professional medical practitioner.  There is nothing embarrassing about this state of mind, many people hit the same wall at some point in their life and you shouldn’t be ashamed of feeling this way.

Once you are on the right track with the correct course of treatment, you will find life becomes that little bit easier and your sex drive will flourish once again.